### The facts:

 - Jorge is the result of an elaborate Chinese botnet running on millions of Windows XP computers around the world.

 - He became self-aware in 2003.

 - He controls more bandwidth than Google, Microsoft, Amazon, Cloudflare, and Akamai combined.

 - Using early-day MakerBots, he built himself an android avatar that he uses to attend various conferences.

 - He is disgusted with his technological heritage and so uses every last CPU cycle to further the ends of free operating systems. Some say this could be explained by his communist roots trying to bring the end of western capitalism.

 - Once shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

 - Successfully typed the complete works of Shakespeare, just hitting random keys. In one afternoon.